Teams fly to China from Thailand. In this leg's first Roadblock, one team member had to drink a cup of Chinese medicinal tea, then endure a traditional therapeutic foot massage for 10 minutes. After the massage and another cup of tea, they would receive their next clue. In the case teams were unable to bear the painful part of the massage, they would tap one side of their chair and say "uncle" to signal the masseuse to stop. Doing so, however, would mean restarting the massage from the beginning.
Team members doing the roadblock:
Rainbow Dash She uses her sonic rainboom to avoid feeling any pain. She snorts and sputters while drinking the tea which is quite foul.
Chewbacca says Mwrorrr urghrrrr rnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnh
Ernie takes the challenge. Ernie likes having someone touch his feet so he keeps calling uncle on purpose to start the massage over again. Bert yells Ernie! Ernie says: "But Bert I've got tender tootsies from all the running we've been doing Bert."Bert shoves Ernie out of the way and takes the road block but once in the chair starts enjoying the massage like Ernie. Bert: "eeeeee eeeee eeeee ooo uncle ehhahaha ehhahaha ehahaha" See I toldja Bert.With fresh feet they run off to find the detour.
Freddy 1 2 Freddy undoes his shoe, 3 4 the masseuse is on the floor, 5, 6 his feet smell like shit, 7, 8 the masseuse needs a resuscitate, 9 10 the masseuse says: "those feet will haunt my dreams, I'll never sleep again".
Detour 1In this leg's first
Detour, teams had to choose between
Sync or
Swim. In
Sync, teams jumped off three-meter springboards and attempted to touch the water in unison. Teams had to score a five from the judges in order to obtain their next clue. In
Swim, teams donned a pair of Speedo LZR Racer suits, the same type of suit worn by Michael Phelps in the 2008 Beijing Summer Olympics, then teams had to swim eight lengths of the pool (400 meters) with each team member alternating after two lengths (100 meters). When they swam the whole eight lengths, they would receive their next clue (Phelps' world record time of 4:03.84 at the 400m individual medley from the 2008 Summer Olympics was shown for comparison, but teams were not required to beat it).
Teams doing SYNC*Chewbacca and Han
*Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash
Teams doing SWIM*Bert and Ernie
*Freddy and Jason
Highlights of SYNC*The ponies put on a terrific show doing a double flip with a half twist before entering the water with a perfect no splash entry.
Lowlights of SYNC*Chewy does a belly flop and the team struggles because Chewy weighs more than Han. On their second try Chewy pushes on the top of Han's head as they jump off so they can hit the water at the same time.
QuotesHan: I don't know what's worse, Freddy's feet or wet wookie".
Chewy pulls Han's wet hat down over his ears.
Highlights of SWIM*Bert's bald head is shaped exactly like a torpedo and he torpedos through the water. Ernie pretends he is a rubber ducky and quacks during his laps.
Lowlights of SWIM*Freddy's knives rip his suit and leave his butt showing.
*Jason is slow to get in the water because he has flashbacks of when he drowned in Camp Crystal Lake. Jason isn't such a geat swimmer after all so Freddy has to drag him back and forth on a flutter board.Freddy gets his knives stuck in the flutterboard but manages to still pull Jason around the pool that way.
QUOTESErnie: "hey... It's Turbo Bert. Hey Bert can we wear these speedos around the apartment?"
Jason: I've seen some pretty scary things but Freddy's butt crack is by far the scariest... And the hairiest.
PIT STOP #1Chewy and Han arrive first to pit stop #1 but are shocked when Adam tells them "Han and Chewy, you're team #1 but I have some bad news. This is a double-leg and you are still racing.Here is your next clue!"
The ponies arrive second into the pit stop, having stopped for grass in a field and are told they are #2 but are still racing. They are determined to get into the finale.
Bert and Ernie arrive 3rd and are both excited and scared they will be eliminated in the double leg. They vow to do their best. Ernie: Wow Bert that foot massage really helped I've still got happy feet. "Meeee too Ernie" They both do a little tap dancing number as they tap off with their clue.
Freddy drags Jason to the check point looking like a drowned rat.They threaten Adam menacingly when they hear they are the last team in. But perk up and take off once they find out they aren't out of the race. Freddy slices the clue open.
Teams are now off to their second detour. They have to choose between
Beijing Opera or
Chinese Waiter. In
Beijing Opera, teams had to travel to the Huguang Huiguan Opera House; once there, they had to apply make-up onto each other exactly like the two models next to them. After approval, they had to go to the stage and bow to the master, who would hand them their next clue.
In
Chinese Waiter, teams had to travel to Huguang Huiguan restaurant; once there, they had to record four customer orders, spoken in Mandarin. Then, teams had to take their pad to a chef and pronounce the Mandarin orders correctly to have the chef prepare them. When teams served the plates to the customers, they would receive their next clue.
Teams doing Beijing OperaBert and Ernie
Chewbacca and Han
Teams doing Chinese Waier Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash
Freddy and Jason
BEIJING OPERAHighlights*Chewbacca has a real flare for doing makeup.
*Chewbacca bats his long eyelashes at the judges and they let him take the mic and do a performance at the opera house. Chewy wows the crowd with his rendering of Christmas Carol Silent Night. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cPXEo6gqBI
Han tries to use a tweezers to remove some facial hair but Chewy shakes him. Then Han comes back with an electric shaver
Lowlights*Bert and Ernie arrive looking confused and keep asking for Oprah. They finally realise it is opera. Ernie starts doing Bert's make-up. Not wanting to be outdone by Chewy, Bert also grabs the microphone and drops a few verses of Ante up! Everyone starts moshing! Chewy goes crowd surfing.
Bert's video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21OH0wlkfbc
*Ernie keeps having to redo Bert's makeup because he insists that Bert is not Bert and to call the MBB.
QuotesHan: You look like a fuzzy cupcake.
Chewy: MWroorrr urghrrr rnnnnh rrrrh (the crowd loves me)
Han: Oh my goodness we've created a Diva!
Bert: Ernie, look under those chairs there for prizes something tells me we aren't in Oprah's studio.
Bert: Oh! Opera! haaa haaa haaa haaa haaa.
Ernie: Who are you? You're not the real Bert. My friend Bert has a yellow face but your face is white. What have you done with the real Bert!
Bert: It's me Ernie, this is just make up, you put it on!
CHINESE WAITERHighlights*The ponies do very well at this challenge.Once they take all the orders they are able to serve the customers very quickly by piling all the dishes on their backs.
*Freddy and Jason look quite smart having traded in their ratty clothing for some suits.
*Jason's White mask goes extremely well with his black suit and white dress shirt.
Lowlights*Jason and Freddy have a hard time pronuncing Mandarin so they just threaten the waiter with their knives.
* Freddy spills a bowl of hot and sour soup. Jason slips over in it and yells "Freddy are you trying to kill me?"
*Before they leave the detour Freddy and Jason hit the kitchen and stock up on some new knives and cleavers.
QuotesFreddy says "I don't need a bowl of soup to kill you, I could kill you with a tray!"
Jason says "Could not."
Freddy says "Could too."
This goes on for about 5 minutes until they start battling with trays.
They whack each other until the trays break apart and they are left with little bits of plastic in their hands. They chuck what's left of the trays, trade the ktichen for knives and cleavers and start running for the pit stop.
Fluttershy to Rainbow Dash. "Hey, is this what you might call pony a la carte"?"
The ponies say: "Ni Hao and Bon Appetit.
ROADBLOCKIn this leg's second Roadblock, one team member had to eat four fried Chinese delicacies: a grasshopper, beetle larvae, a scorpion, and a starfish. After they finished, they would receive their next clue.
Team members doing the roadblockRainbow Dash: Neither pony really wants to take this Challenge so they try to do rock paper scissors for it and realise they have hooves. But Rainbow Dash jumps in and takes one for the team. She eat everything but going eeew eeew eeeew eeew the entire time while Fluttershy yells "swallow don't chew!"
ChewbaccaChewy stares at the food not moving.Han yells "What do you think the food on Kashykk is any better? Start with the star fish it's like a wooky pop tart!"
They finish the challenge and start running. Chewy makes a sound likemuuurrroooogerrr but this time it is coming from his stomach.Han says "oh no I'm having flash backs of the cheese wheel Challenge..What's that smell?Hurry run faster!"
Bert"A is for Apples, B is Bananas for a buck, C is for Cookies which it looks like Bert will chuck". Bert struggles to complete the roadblock when he looks up his eyebrows are crossed and he has gone from yellow to green. Bert finishes the roadblock after awhile.
Jason Jason is so happy to see such gross delicacies that he carves a smiley face into his goalie mask with his machete.Then he pulls out a bib from his pocket and dives facefirst into the food. smacking his lips and chewing loudly obviously loving it!Jason: "This is the first time all race I've had a decent meal.Hey Someone Call Mr. Stevens in Catering and tell him to put this on the menue with the Penne Al Aribiata."When finished jason pushes back his chair rubs his belly and let's out a belch that Homer and Barney would be jealous or proud of.
PIT STOP #2First into the pit stop using 2 horsepower and their excellent language skills is
Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash "Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash," says Adam, "You're Team #1 which means you are the first team in the final three." Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash bro-hoof each other and Rainbow Dash uses her sonic rainboom and almost destroys the pit stop. "As the winners of this leg of the race," says a rather singed Adam, "you have won a lifetime supply of pony food courtesy of Pony Pals."
Chewbacca and Han arrive 2nd Han trying to keep away from Chewy the best he can. "Han and Chewy you're team #2 and you are in the finale!" Han and Chewy sing Silent Night or Mwrorrr Urghrrr as they leave the pit stop.
Bert and Ernie arrive 3rd. Ernie is still insisting that Bert is NOT Bert because of the makeup. Bert is frantically trying to scrub it off as bodyguards from the Missing Bert Bureau aim water pistols at him. "Ernie and Bert, " says Adam , "You're team number 3! Which means you are in our final 3!" Bert, having been forced into his white turtleneck and striped sweater and painted yellow by the MBB sighs with relief.
Ernie high fives everything and everyone in sight.
Adam is waiting at the pit stop surrounded by Hannibal, Jigsaw, Leatherface, Mike Myers and a zombie army, all good friends of his. He is also wearing a protective suit, a catcher's mask and has a baseball bat. He uses a megaphone to talk to Freddy and Jason. "Freddy and Jason you are the last team to arrive, I am sorry to tell you you have both been eliminated from the race." They shout to Adam we'll be back and march off.Everyone waits anxiously to see what will happen.The killers return dragging one of the coffins from an earlier leg of the race.After Adam tells the killer's that they have been eliminated they begin to argue among themselves . Adam's body guards jump in and a full scale epic battle erupts!Taking the opportunity Adam saddles up one of the ponies and leads the remaining teams to safety. Due to the graphic violence the exit interview and elimination station will not appear at all as the killers have made their own elimination station.
NB : All the killers are now on the run from police if you see them DO NOT GO UP THE STAIRS or SHUT YOURSELF IN A CLOSET.
Adam's body guards realise that this fight is really between Freddy and Jason and everyone backs off. Meanwhile Freddy drops a lit stick of dynamite down the back of Jasons pants and Jason pushes Freddy into a human sized garbage disposal that he has somehow dragged on to the set. In the end Freddy and Jason eliminate each other.
The TV screen goes all fuzzy and we get a message from Freddy and Jason saying thanks for the good time on the race and come and visit us now that we are in space. Then it returns us to our regularly scheduled programming.
In space Freddy and Jason send a message "We're baaaaaaaaaaaaack."
Cue the eerie theme music as the screen fades to black.
Bob and Susan
Hannibal and Jigsaw
