Friday, December 5, 2014

Masterchef brought to you by ABC Cleaning and the Missing Bert Bureau

This year on The Amazing Race, teams take a break from the race to fuel up with food. 

Teams competing:
Rocket and Groot
Spock and Bones Mccoy
Swedish Chef and Chicken
Freddy and Jason

Adam and Bill
Vegeta and Nappa
Beastly and No Heart
Ernie and Bert

Judges: Gordon Ramsay,  Shaggy, Samwise Gamgee 

The challenge:
Each team is given a quart of heavy cream and told to whip it to stiff peaks. Whoever had the thickest cream - measured by holding the bowl upside-down over one of the judges' heads - would get an advantage for the next team challenge.

Highlights:
*Rocket holds the bowl and Groot uses a branch to whip up a beautiful peaked whipping cream.

*Spock and Bones take a very logical approach. Spock holds the timer in one hand and a taser in the other, tasing Bones at 10 sec intervals in order to get the right consistency.

*Bert whips up a perfect bowl of cream, with nice stiff peaks. Ernie says "hey Bert, those peaks are really pointy, just like your head." 

Lowlights:
*Adam and Bill whip up a perfectly peaked bowl of cream but two little cat like ninjas sneak up and lick the cream bowl empty.

*Swedish Chef starts chasing the chicken with a cleaver, and accidentally knocks Vegeta and Nappa's bowl flying into the air. The bowl lands on Nappa's head, knocking him out cold. To which Vegeta says, "the whipping champion just got whipped."

*Freddy tries to whip the cream but his knife glove hand keeps cutting down the peaks. 

*No Heart turns into a tornado and gets cream all over Beastly, so he looks like the abominable snowman.

Quotes

Spock and Bones: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Damnit,Spock  I'm a doctor, not a pastry chef!
Spock: *tasers him again* This argument is illogical.
Bones: You're illogical.
Spock: keep whipping, doctor!! 


Groot: I AM GROOT.
Rocket: *points to Jason's mask* I need that guy's mask, to complete this challenge.

THE JUDGES CHALLENGE:

Teams must now pour their cream over the judges head. The top three teams are Spock and Bones, Rocket and Groot and Bert and Ernie. 

Ernie and Bert go first. They turn their bowl over Shaggy's head. Shaggy looks up, and compliments them. "Aw man, those are some perfect peaks. I gotta peek a little closer." Shaggy puts his face up to the bowl and starts licking the cream out. 

Rocket and Groot go second with Samwise Gamgee. They go to pour the cream over Sam's head. While they're pouring the cream, Groot grows a flower and Sam is so in awe of it, that he completely forgets to judge them, until the cream falls on his head. 

Spock and Bones are last with Gordon Ramsay. Spock says to Gordon Ramsay, "this challenge is very illogical." Bones who is feeling ill from the effect of the taser, says, "i may throw up on you." Then Spock turns the bowl of cream over, and the cream doesn't come out. Gordon Ramsay says, "those peaks are absolutely perfect. It's like you made them in a food processor. Gentlemen you are the winners of this challenge." Spock turns to Bones and sees, "see that,. You are a food processor, not a doctor," tasing him one more time, at which point Bones vomits all over Chef Ramsay. And the chicken, trying to escape from the Swedish Chef knocks the bowl out of Spock's hands, pouring it all over Chef Ramsay. 

Gordon Ramsay wipes the vomit and cream from his face. "it took me all morning to get my hair like that." He is then to reward the winning team of this cooking challenge, with a golden spatula, a food processor, and a diamond encrusted barf bag.